“If you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all.” Now, let’s be honest, we have all heard that saying at least once in our lives. Most likely you were given that piece of advice by your parents who in turn were told the exact same thing by their own parents when they were young as well. It’s nice to be nice! WELL, that’s very true but even being nice has it’s limits.
May I just state now that I’m in no way attempting to or looking to encourage or condone any harmful behaviour – this isn’t what this blog post is about. What this blog post IS about is how being nice to others often results in the individuals own unhappiness. It’s something which is often overlooked by the majority and whilst I, personally, would not consider myself to be an unhappy person overall, the scenario is something which I frequently find myself in: changing my own view or actions or basing a decision as to ensure that someone else is happy even if it means sacrificing my own, even if it is only for a brief moment.
Unfortunately, this is something which I agree with. You may disagree and that’s fine but from my own personal experience this does seem to be the case with myself and many others who go out of their way daily to make others happy BEFORE themselves.
I can’t speak on behalf of anyone else but for myself saying no is actually a lot harder to do, especially when the person or situation itself is intimidating… Or if I merely like them too much, saying no to someone I like or love fills me with a terrible sense of guilt that I can’t help but be annoyed with myself… and then the vicious circle occurs and I grow even more annoyed at myself for being so annoyed in the first place.
This may seem like a rant of sorts and I apologise for it seeming like so but I suppose it is just a way in which I can vent about something I normally wouldn’t discuss with anyone. Perhaps this is a way in which I can discover that I’m not the only one like this if I am not…